UPCOMING RETREAT

Conscious Communication Retreat (Foundation Course): Language that Builds Connection, Trust and Intimacy

By Samantha Lee Brain, MSOT

Dates: 10, 11 & 12 May 2024
Location: The Centre for Purposeful Living, La Mercy, KwaZulu-Natal

Samantha and the Centre for Purposeful Living, invite you to join us for a weekend retreat exploring conscious communication – a new way of thinking, connecting, living and being in the world.

What is Conscious Communication?

Being in relationships with other humans can be a messy struggle. Despite our best intentions to be mindful, compassionate humans, it can be very difficult to stay aligned with our values while we are in conflict.

Over the course of human history, and especially in South African history, we’ve all been well schooled in language that was used to dominate and control humans. But unfortunately this language also keeps us locked in power struggles and habitual patterns of fight, flight, appeasing or freezing.

And you may, like me, have been raised in a family where a lot of painful language was used regularly in an attempt to express emotions and get needs met. Or perhaps, you were raised in an environment where feelings and individual needs weren’t expressed at all, and perhaps you were even shamed for expressing yourself.

There is a different language that we can learn that helps us connect to each other deeply when things are hard. One that embraces conflicts as precious opportunities to get to know ourselves and people in our lives more deeply and helps us find strategies to work together to build more harmony and cooperation. This language was invented by Psychologist Marshall Rosenberg, and was first called Non-Violent Communication or NVC and this workshop is inspired by his work.

He called this language giraffe language – because like a giraffe NVC has a large heart, a long neck that gives it a lot of perspective and an incredible ability to digest thorns and turn them into nourishment.

Retreat with Us

This workshop will take place in a retreat format, giving you time to reflect, offering yoga, meditation and periods of silence, to encourage inner awareness. The Centre for Purposeful living offers a serene space close to the ocean to support deep resourcing and nourishment. Daily movement practices of walking and yoga are encouraged in the schedule to allow time to discharge stress and care for your body. Healthy meals are prepared for you to allow you to be present and well nourished while you focus on expanding your mental and emotional capacity.

The Learning and Exploring

Information will be presented about 40% of the time, and 60% of learning will take place through practical exercises in pairs (with random pairing). There will be live demonstrations of real life experiences and you will be asked to share things from your own life – however what you choose to share is completely voluntary and confidential. There will be puppets!

Topics Covered

The art of self-connection and self-empathy: Understanding first our own feelings and needs/longings and settling our own inner turmoil before we can then turn with a more open presence to hear others.
The art of exquisite self care: Embracing what deeply matters to us in every situation, we can clearly assert life-serving boundaries and make clear requests.
Unlearning our interpretations: Distinguishing between observations vs. interpretations of situations. We learn how to interpret our own feelings free of evaluations.
Embracing the Jackal: Learning to hear the important messages under the blame/shame/criticism of ourselves and others.
Develop a vocabulary of needs or longings: Values that are universal and that we can all relate to and underlie all our sometimes painful strategies and struggles.

We begin to understand that there are unlimited resources and strategies available to meet everyone’s needs and make life more wonderful for all.

All topics covered incorporate trauma awareness and somatic or body based practices to help you deeply connect to the topic so that transformation happens on all levels of your experience not just in the brain.

Long-Term Impact of Learning NVC

In this foundational course you will learn the foundations of NVC practice that can support you to live out your values with integrity. NVC is not just a language tool, it is a powerful intention to connect to the humanity in everyone. This content will empower you to think more critically about systems of power and hierarchy and will hopefully inspire you to contribute towards a more harmonious world in work, home and personal spheres. Walking a path of non-violence is not easy. Undoing our own habitual habits and patterns takes self-awareness, vulnerability and commitment. Like learning any language it takes practice and support. This is a foundational course, and an intermediate course continues after this to build more skill and integration of NVC language. Practicing and attending regular NVC gatherings is recommended to support learning and integration. Something Marshall Rosenberg said gives me great comfort as an imperfect human being trying to be in NVC consciousness: he said, “we can just try and get progressively less stupid”. So know that this is a new language and a different way of being that can take many years to fully integrate. And, sometimes the best we can do is to try and just be that little bit more conscious in moments where we can, and hopefully expand that over time.

NVC and Relationships

Please keep in mind that this method will not necessarily save your romantic relationship. It will not make things easy. Relationships take two people cooperating to create a more wonderful life, and one person working on their own with NVC tools will likely not be enough to make your relationship work long-term. However; NVC will give you the tools to understand yourself, to connect with what needs/values matter most to you, and to give you tools to ask for what you need – or realize your needs cannot be met and it is time to explore other strategies. Learning NVC will definitely support your relationships with partners, friends and colleagues. It will give you tools to get the support you need from others in the NVC community, and personally I use an empathy buddy for emotional support and inner clarity regularly and find it very helpful. You will have access to a community of support in Durban following the course, and you might be inspired to be an empathic support to others.

Practical Information

The workshop takes place at the Centre for Purposeful Living in La Mercy, just outside of the Durban area and a 15 minute drive from King Shaka Airport. Transport to and from the airport is available before and after the workshop ends for R100 per trip.

The workshop starts at 6:30 PM on Friday, May 10th and ends at 4:00 PM on Sunday, May 12th.

Cost

Tuition: R3,000 per person for Conscious Communication Workshop

Plus
R1,200 for non live-in (includes all meals and refreshments) or
R1,450 – R2,600 for live-in, depending on the accommodation type

Accommodation including all meals and refreshments, for two nights:

Main en-suite: R2,600 (1 person) R3,800 (2 people sharing)
The Stable, courtyard en-suite: R2,000 (1 person), R3,200 (2 people sharing)
Sea Facing Double, shared bathroom: R1,900 (1 person), R3,100 (2 people sharing)
Double with Balcony, shared bathroom: R1,800 (1 person), R3,000 (2 people sharing)
Courtyard Twin Beds, shared bathroom: R1,700 (1 person), R2,900 (2 people sharing)

Limited Spaces Available

Reserve your spot now and embark on a transformative journey towards more authentic, fulfilling relationships. Don’t miss out on this opportunity to revolutionize your communication style and enrich your life.

To Book: fiona@centreforpurposefuliving.co.za or 061 497 3551

Payment Details
The Centre for Purposeful Living
FNB
Acc: 62895246843
Code: 250655

About The Centre for Purposeful Living

The Centre for Purposeful Living is a suburban retreat centre on the North coast of KwaZulu-Natal. We offer live-in therapeutic retreats for anyone wishing to engage in intensive therapy and mindfulness over the course of several days.

Retreatants will spend these days in a tranquil space with comfortable accommodation, healthy food, practicing gentle yoga and various sitting meditations, with ongoing intensive therapeutic engagement.

If you’d like to know more about our next retreat, please email Fiona: fiona@centreforpurposefuliving.co.za.